The real reason why I can't sleep.

I tell people its because of school work or because of tests and that I have to stay up late. Really, its because I just can't.

I love those long minutes when I am alone with nothing but my pillow. There is nothing to disrupt my chain of though.

So I think. A lot.

Sometimes, I think about life. Sometimes, I think about God. Sometimes, I think about who I want to be. And sometimes, I think about ferrets. As you can see, it varies a lot.

I think too much. I can't help it.
My room is so still, so quiet. And my mind is so loud.

I hate it, a bit. All the thinking brings up things that I'd rather not think about. And its weird, because once I start thinking, I just can't stop.


I don't want to get into it though. That'll mean I'll have to think about it, and like I said, once I start, I can't stop.

Kinda like alcohol to an alcoholic who has just relapsed.

Such a bad analogy.

Am I even making sense? Its really late guys, excuse my stoner mind. I'll go back to counting stars now, and waiting to fall asleep.

This definitely is a weird post.




love, and love again,
alysha.